Dates aren't just a type of fruit.

I have been doing a lot of thought recently on the subject of dating, or the lack thereof. What really is the best way to find someone to spend the rest of your life with? The most common answer would be to go out and date an individual that you find attractive or interesting until you both decided that you are right for each other, or that you should part ways. This is the most common and accepted method in today’s culture, a culture in which traditional ideals of how a household should function are frowned upon. Now, the more I reflect upon the nature of the choice that dating is supposed to help one make, I have come to the conclusion that, not only is this not the best way to find a spouse, but it very well could be the worst way (besides perhaps complete parental selection, which, like an absolute monarchy could be either really good or really bad, depending on the person in charge of making that choice) to result in a solid and healthy marriage. What do I advocate then, instead of what the culture I am living in is telling me I should do? Well, I have come to the conclusion that a sort of “courting” is the right solution. Now, there are many theories as to the best way to go about courting, but I have chosen a set of fairly accepted rules to the process that I think make the most sense, and also are beneficial in all ways which those rules apply to the process.

How does courting work? Well, first of all, the parents of the daughter are about ten times more involved than with dating. As a guy, the idea is that you know the girl for quite a while before hand, as friends or whatever before the possibility of marriage with that girl even enters the mind. Then, if you really think that this girl might be indeed the girl for you, you go and ask the girls father for permission to pursue his daughter as a marital prospect, in which case, there is a certain amount of time, in which you can only schedule times with the parents of the girl’s permission, and in extreme cases, under the parent’s supervision. The length of this period can very, and can often be determined by the parents of the girl. During this time, there is to be no courting with other girls. Then, if the relationship continues to grow to the point of marriage, the once again, one must ask the father’s permission before proposing. The parents of the girl may object and end the relationship right there if they so please. If permission is granted, then, you may go ahead and propose. It is thought to be right that at least a year elapses between the time when permission to court the girl is granted, and the guy asks for permission to propose.

Now, coming from a guy, this may seem a little odd. Why on earth would I want to put restrictions on myself? Well, for one, I view it as my duty to do so. Secondly, why put myself in a stupid situation that dating often brings about. Through the process of courting, it takes a big load off of the shoulders of the individuals courting, in a different sort of way. The individuals that are courting can focus on just a relationship, and don’t have to event think about all of the other garbage that goes along with dating. Now, I’ll admit, at first, I didn’t exactly like all of the ideas put forth above. I was petrified at the idea of asking permission to court, as I get rather embarrassed and then as consequence rather tongue tied quite easily. But as I’ve gotten older and thought about it a bit more, I realized how logical the entire thing is. I have come to the conclusion that Courting is the only way to go.